The bushes, I
remember, have been there in the tales of my love!
The breath, the tears, and the aura of
virgin forest -
The art, the sighs ,
the darkness, the motorcycle, the roads, the unending journeys, have been
there!
And, the unending waits, too!
And then, there was desperation, and urge to enfeeble the weak!
Whatsoever, power is immaterial while being
in love...
Like my love, I was flowing.
Rather, my love was flowing like I was.
I took in; all that you gave me... dear
Love!
And then, there was Malena.
And as I passed my boyhood days, there was
Hannah.
Some time later I realized that I was still
that kid, the Renato.
I never grew up in love! I never grew up!
In my love, there was one more person - My dad!
Like the honorable chief guest of some rare
occasions, he walked in, to reconstruct me.
Rather, I surrendered, shedding all my
pride away.
And, I acknowledge him. I was wrecked
before he came.
You are there in the tale of my love, dad!
Yea, and then, there were power failures,
There was sweat that I have breathed in the
limited permitted minutes.
I do remember, I have always been in a
hurry...
Maybe forefathers would have farsighted my
premature death while being in love!
Yea, they were there... My great grandfathers were there in my love and the history of my heredity.
The unpaved roads to my ancestral home,
And the derailed, unmarried man who walked
in there -
While my grandmother was sitting on that pyol of
my legendary home, probably chewing the betel leaves.
Everyone was there in my love...
I shared my history, my sensual intolerant
present, and sometimes my ambitious future...
In the tale of my love everything and
everyone was there...
I spared or saved none or nothing... But,
only a little well received!
And your tears, those seen and unseen -
Regarded and disregarded.
I have seen it and felt it. I admit.
And what else? Oh... I see nothing now. I
only feel events, I don't see anything.
And there were rented homes, I remember, in my love!
And, there was wilderness when I was
allowed to intertwine being there!
And there was also five minutes of nap
under permissible conditions!!
I remember, I was an obedient boy...!
And, there was your uncompromising morality
as well, in my love!
And there were some beautiful words which only we too would understand and smile...
Words have been there in my love...
Tremendously flooding words...
The vocabularies… Oh, my love! Those
poetically beautiful vocabularies...
Like our children - the future, we also
gave birth to wonderful vocabularies.
Yes, there were dark ages when I was lost
irresistibly when you were gone.
My poignant street rides, knowing not the
destination,
Amid my wandering days, there was a
breastfeeding woman in a car upon whose sight I started to shiver...
And there was rain. Nobody knows... nobody
knows...
Oh God! I would be glad if you really
exist!
Yes, there was rain... The rain was there every time, blessing me and my soul.
Amid those motorcycle journeys in rain,
God, you gave us shelter as well.
Your design of my twenty-five years is
hereby admired with gratitude.
Yes! I have cried for your refuge, cursed
you, and sometimes warned you.
But, you were there in the tales of my
love, dear God! I admit your irreplaceable presence...
And, my journeys were dangerously swift in a way that none can ever imagine.
To take control of the clocking time, I was
driving for her...
There is no record of those miles I have
traversed through the roads that reach her...
Oh God! Those roads... Those roads were
spread in three different territories.
I have covered them all like the seven
skies Muhammed had to pass to reach God Almighty!
I can't imagine how I made those long
solitary journeys back and forth unto her those days...
Time! You just gave the best and worst for me.
You, time! You are noted.
And that time is gone.
I know, gone is gone forever!
No conclusions. I am clocking now.
The needles are under control.
My love is not... its wilderness is not.
They are subtly allowed to remain alive.
So, my love is, subtly, alive.
The brook is calm now.
And, my love has always been private... naked and pure...
My love was not enveloped in floral designs
and placed amid scented candles...
It was raw and wild, yet sweet, I
believe... at times, worse!
But, I gave it all while being in love...
all of my soul.
I was "giving"...
And there were brutal sacrifices, inhibitions, and sometimes, submissions, of which there is no record of –
Just like the entire tale of my love!
In spite of the deep wounds you have
caused, precisely, my love has caused my heart, I am thankful for time!
With due gratitude, I shall hereby quit the
words to the gone!
...
Also, like you know, there were black
They are beautiful... They were
beautiful...
They were beautiful like the so many
"unlived" moments that I buried alive!
Maybe, I was a lunatic as Paul, the last tango in Paris, for which you have shot me to death...!
But I am not dead...
I know not about my "love".
The End.
